Breast vs. Bottle

Ok, I can't decide what I want to do. I have successfully nursed Ryan for 9 months. For the past month, he has not wanted to nurse except on rare occassion. This poses a problem for me. It is very inconvenient to try and pump while he is roaming free, as this leaves him ample time to get into everything he shouldn't. And if I put him in the playpen, he screams at the top of his lungs until I am done. He takes both formula and breastmilk equally with ease, so that is not an issue. But the day that made it come home for me: having to pump in a bathroom while at a class last week. Here is how the dialogue went:

Scene: Computer classroom with a bathroom to the right. Everyone can hear what occurs in this bathroom, as it is not soundproof insulated and is 3 feet away.

Me: Is there a place where I can go to pump on breaks?

Instructor: There's a bathroom right there, or there is one down the hall.

Helpfull classmate: Yeah, I also saw one downstairs by the elevator.

Me [thinking]: Sure, let me just prepare your meal in the bathroom, and see how you like it.

So after that day, it got me thinking...if my new job does not allow a good private place for me to pump for 15 minutes, do I want to continue this for another 2 months and provide the breastmilk for Ryan, or do I call it quits and congratulate myself that I made it this long?

Though our society is screaming that breastfeeding is best, it is only best when it lasts for 3-6 months, or is not ever seen. I am catching so much crap because I am still pumping for my son. The same people that made me feel guilty because I wasn't sure at first if it was something I wanted to do are now critizing me because I still am. Go figure.

Next post: hopefully a video of Ryan walking. I will be working on it today.

Pictures

Well, we went to the zoo, and I would describe the pictures, however at this time, they are coming up as gobbeldy goop. But the first one I know makes me proud as a mother. To have my son getting a Corona out of the trash while standing on a Corona box, there is just nothing better.

A month in summary

Well, since my last post, Ryan has been diagnosed with pneumonia, recovered, and my family has come to visit. Oh, and now we have a driveway and pad site on our new land. It has been rather hectic around our house, to say the least. Ryan did rather well being so sick. He was a little whiney for a few days, but that was all. Once I could get the on-call doctor to take me seriously and order me some cough medicine and antibiotics for him, he got better much quicker. But his coughing was keeping him up, and waking him up, anytime he tried to sleep. Poor baby was exhausted (and so were we) that when he finally stopped coughing, he slept straight through the night, then took two 3 hour naps. It was lovely!

Our land is just waiting for us! I can just see so much potential, now that we have something done over there. I am so anxious for the next phase, its just a matter of money, of course. I keep reminding myself, patience is a virtue.

Well, Mom, Dad, and Grandma Doris came to visit and we had such a wonderful time. How is it that you don't do much during the day besides 3 trips to Wal-Mart, but you feel like you have worked so hard?! Perhaps its the fact that I had to give up my naps. This has me worried when its time for the next baby...can I do it? I am so spoiled sleeping when Ryan sleeps right now.

Until the next event occurs,
marcie